If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God,

— James 1:5 (KJV)

When someone asks for help with a decision, I can be quick to think of what I would do. But the choice might involve pressures I haven’t heard about. A friend choosing between two jobs, for example, may be thinking more about time with family than the difference in pay.

James begins with the possibility that I lack wisdom. That gives me room to pray and ask another question before offering advice. “What would be hardest about taking this job?” might open up a part of the decision I hadn’t considered.

I want the person to leave the conversation with a clearer sense of their choices. Sometimes that takes a suggestion. Sometimes it takes a few minutes of listening and the honesty to say, “I’d need more time to think about that with you.”